Nightshade’s Poetry

Always
Dwelling in happiness for just a few hours
before it got ripped away
Leaving behind a naked and vulnerable self

Words, as sharp as a sword
Words fed by fear
Fear, fed by expectations set too high
by feelings thought to be returned
– by love

Staring into the darkness
the words left behind
All that could be done
is crumbled inside
To the outside
everything goes on
like it always has been

Like I did
Like I will do

Always


Life
I never felt so numb and dead inside in my whole life
like I feel now.
No feelings.
No pain.
No tears.
Only emptiness inside crawling under my skin.
Can’t even scream
though I want to
though I need to.
That’s life.
Life’s a pain.


Confusion
I have cried at night
tears of pain, of sadness.

I have laughed at day
laughter of joy, of happiness.

Times change.

Now

I cry at day
tears of joy, of happiness.

And

I laugh at night
laughter of pain, of sadness.

Something is wrong in this picture,
and I’m not sure it is me.
Maybe

it is you?


Broken Angel
Broken Wings
Broken Soul
Broken Heart
Your wings will mend eventually
Your soul will heal, though scarred
Your heart will forever miss pieces
that fell to the ground as tears
and ended in shards.


Sometimes
Sometimes I am able to pretend
I don’t love him anymore.
Sometimes I can watch and listen to him
and don’t show emotions.
Sometimes I even laugh with him
or joke with him.
But he’ll never see the tears I cry
…every time.


Listen to me
I so want to tell him how much I love him.
I so want to tell him how much he means to me.
I so want to tell him how much I miss him.
I so want to tell him how much he hurt me.
I so want to tell him how easily he broke me.
I have to tell him so much, but he doesn’t listen to me
…anymore.


Doesn’t matter
It doesn’t matter where you are.
It doesn’t matter what you do.
It doesn’t matter how many miles are between us.
It doesn’t matter because you’re in my heart,
you make me feel whole, you’re always in my mind.
It just doesn’t matter…
…because I love you


Said (roughly translated)
I’m not pretty, some say.
I’m not ugly, say others.
I’m not smart, some say.
I’m not stupid, say others.
I’m not nice, some say.
I’m not arrogant, say others.
Not?!
Take me as I am or not at all.
I am what I am!
Me…


Pretending
Hear me joking around with my friends
Hear me laughing with strangers
Hear me scolding when I’m attacked
Hear me singing a song for my loved ones
But never lean closer
and listen to the voice behind the words
because you might find out
I’m only pretending to be
alright


Still do…
Careless words spoken by him shattered her world;
heart and soul torn into pieces.
They promised to stay friends,
but everytime he mentions the new woman in his life,
her heart dies a little more,
her eyes cry so much tears she never thought possible.
He turned away, took all she held dear from her.
Yet – she still loves him.


Far away
The taste of your lips on mine…
The touch of your hands on my body…
The soft whisper of your breath in my ear…
The embrace of your voice in my mind…
…and the bitter sadness when I wake up,
only to find out it was just a dream…
…you’re too far away….


Missed?
Handsome
Gentle
Kind
Caring
Tender
Reliable
Humorous
Adorable
Witty
Loving
…between all this I must have missed a part…
…in you.


Tears of Ice (roughly translated)
Again tears dwell in my eyes.
Icy tears, because of you.
They run over my cheeks, burn on my face.
You say you need time.
You didn’t say it would be
an eternity…